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i saw you in passing
the stain i should wash it the oatmeal sweater with the splotch on the sleeve i wonder, what did you eat? carrot juice, tomato soup? if i wash it than this testament that you were here, that you wore this sweater before i did, is gone and i don’t want to be the one to wash…
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anticipatory grief
it’s just dust what do i do when you suck the grief from the room i’ll be strong but you’re wrong it’s not just you who’s misunderstood as if you could know what it’s like to lose a father they don’t either i don’t know what to say me neither, but you asked me how…
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summer so far
anticipation i wanted to grow up now i wish i could grow down i’m acting like a little kid dancing like a clown there’s simplicity in summer and i can’t wait to taste it time flies no matter what is it ever really wasted? rye beach i came here every summer as a kid it’s…
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on your own
Jillian’s phone rings and Andy’s name pops up on the screen. “Your mom has been crying and upset,” he said. “She feels like you don’t need her anymore.” We could hear her, sniffling in the background, obviously on speakerphone. “That’s not true, Mom,” we said. “Of course we need you.” “You’ve never moved without me,”…
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bridget jones
I watched Bridget Jones’ Diary for the first time. I get the sense that it ranges between cult classic or instantly hated– there are a lot of jokes that didn’t age well. The 2001 romantic comedy starring Renée Zellweger is nothing if not problematic. Bridget, a somewhat cringe-worthy, hot mess of a 32 year-old with…
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why I stopped wearing my apple watch (sorry mom)
Her mom gave her the watch for her birthday. She loved it. She just didn’t know how much it would matter. She’s pumping her first in the air, lapping the house, dancing, skipping, anything to close the last ten calories on her Move ring. It was set to 560 calories per day and some days…
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divorce hamsters
Have you ever heard of a divorce hamster? Okay, maybe it’s not always a hamster. Could be a puppy. A cat. Maybe even a fish. The apology pet. My dad dropped them off around Valentine’s day, a “sorry for not showing up to our visits, but here’s a hamster” kind of gift. My mom resisted taking…
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on moving , moving on
A continuation of the big changes in my best friend’s life that affect me… One month ago, Elli moved to Atlanta to join her now husband and one of my closest friends, Isaac, in their new apartment. This past weekend, I flew down to help her get settled in. This was the first trip I’ve…
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silly little walks
A silly little walk for my mental health. Headphones on, daylist playing “pining power ballad tuesday afternoon”. I step out onto the sidewalk, ready to distract myself from life for 20 minutes. I stop for every pretty flower. Snap a picture. Revel in spring. A neighbor two doors down reads her book in a bohemian…
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i’ve been avoiding something
Well for a while I was keeping it a secret. But now that it’s out, I’ve just been avoiding it. My best friend (Elli) got engaged! And not only that, she will be married in a matter of weeks and moving to Atlanta, on the same street as my sister. Where to begin… I think…
diary of a 20 something 